INFORMATION LEAK / Secret communication of socialist deputies about the protest is published

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THE FRAUD IS REVEALED/ The UN accuses Miss World of having done nothing to establish peace in the world!

2026-05-12 17:58:57Patronazhisti SHKRUAR NGA REDAKSIA VOX
Opel Mercedes Subaru scammer shedding crocodile tears after being announced as the winner of Miss World 2025

NEW YORK – It was a tense session last week when the United Nations Security Council decided to call an emergency meeting to discuss the winner of the Miss World 2025 pageant, 24-year-old Opel Mercedes Subaru from Thailand. The Thai beauty is accused of fraud with global consequences, profiting from false promises and damaging the image and dignity of the United Nations.

The members of the Security Council were unanimous in declaring that the promises made by the final year student at Bangkok's Pacific University during the Miss World 2025 competition - that if she won, she would work tirelessly to establish peace in the world - were 100 percent unfulfilled. 

The UN Special Secretary for Peace, the Italian Giuseppe Limonato, was also harsh in his stance:

“Your failure, Ms. Subaru, to ensure world peace within your mandate is in flagrant conflict with the solemn promises made by you on the final night of the Miss World 2025 contest. Correct me if I am wrong; are these your words spoken that evening?”, and Limonato made available to the Security Council several video sequences where Opel clearly and brazenly declared that world peace was its absolute priority if it won.

The accusation was further taken by the UN chief's special advisor, Greek Konstantina Portokaladha:

"Is it true, miss, that while you were making these promises, you were wearing only a pair of bathing suits – actually some embarrassing thongs that I don't know how your parents allowed you to wear – and you were looking at the jurors in the eye to distract them? Hey, why don't you talk?"

***

The emergency session, for the sake of truth, had been requested for several weeks by the representatives of Russia and the United States in the Security Council. In the official request filed with the secretariat, Russia and the United States expressed concern about the situation in Ukraine, the ongoing attacks on Iran, and the situations in Gaza and Lebanon.

In addition to the open disappointment over the extremely poor performance of Opel Mercedes Subaru, diplomats from both countries unanimously declared that the scheme by which international relations had functioned after World War II - where global peace was entrusted to a few girls in their twenties, no matter how beautiful they were - was outdated and needed to be changed.

The 24-year-old Thai woman's tired attempts to justify herself: No, she had been busy with exams, had a fight with her boyfriend, etc., etc., did not convince the Council members.

Not only that, but during the hearing, other unfulfilled promises made by the girl – whose parents, for some reason, had named her after several car brands – during the preliminary competitions that led her to Miss World also came to light.

So, it turned out that before being declared Miss Thailand, the beauty had promised to work for "a safe and loving world, because only in such an environment do I want to bring my future children into life."

Even more flagrant was her declaration two years ago that she would become a worthy ambassador for a clean environment and enough food for all.

"Hey, my snake, where is your peace, clean environment, and food for everyone? Speak up, why don't you speak up?" Limonato and Portokaladha shouted in unison.

***

Although the 24-year-old was overcome with sobs, her shoulders were shaking, and, in shock, she asked to sit down to collect herself, the UN Security Council proved unmoved. By unanimous vote, a resolution was adopted condemning the fraudster and calling on the organizers of Miss World to verify the Misses' broken promises next time.

However, the Council praised Opel Mercedes Subaru for her elegant evening dress and the perfect combination of the color of her shoes and handbag, which were in harmony with other accessories such as the waist belt, bracelet, and earrings.       

Note: Patronazhisti is a satirical column passionate about the bright color trends of this spring-summer 2026 season.


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