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CHARACTER / "Money is not everything". Beni i Kanacheve, happy in his poverty

2022-09-28 23:34:39Patronazhisti SHKRUAR NGA REDAKSIA VOX
CHARACTER / "Money is not everything". Beni i Kanacheve, happy in his
Ben responded to the criticism in the plenum

TIRANA / VLONË / GJINOKASTËR - Some have seen it on Bardhyl street, or in Myslym Shyri, in Tirana. Others have encountered it somewhere from Flag Square in Vlora. Finally, there are chess players who claim to have been there, in Sokak e te Marrëve, when Ben chased a couple of empty Red Bull cans rolling down the street.

"Stop you devil ," Ben called to the cans, "you took us boy, get out in front of those flagged ones, because I'm gone . " But even when he raises his voice, he makes it boring, cheerful, smiling. In the end, there will always be cans and anyway, he will make a living.

That's how everyone knows him, Beni i Kanacheve. He collects all kinds of aluminum foils that used to have drinks inside, crushes them with his feet and throws them into the sack. At the end of the day, he takes them to the collection point and with the money he gets, he buys some bread, cheap cheese and some tomatoes and canned sardines. Every time he gets that little bit of assistance, he overdoes it by buying open cigarettes, but he doesn't put the brandy in his mouth.

***

In general, people are indifferent, but someone may even have stopped for a moment to ask how it is possible that a middle-aged man - albeit poorly dressed - at the peak of his energies and with a lithe physique of a tiger, has turned his back on life. modern and settle for a life on the edge of existence?

The question would get an intriguing answer. Because Ben of the Cans wasn't always like that. Once he was in the center of public attention, engaged politically and often appeared on television, calling on party members to strictly implement the line of measures.

Browsing the press of the time, the Patronageist, also because of the trade, has discovered that Ben had a phone number with a phone company; he had an identity card along with hundreds of thousands of other socialist, democrat and non-party cards; a home address along with twenty other homes; a bank account number with the bank; even in the patronage column of weak points, there is an unpaid loan as well as two unmarried cousins.

On page 4 of Tomorri newspaper with new news, it even turns out that Ben once had a very high official in the government and had a quarrel with the beloved leader. They built together the houses that they had destroyed together, they hatched plans, they welcomed and escorted important foreigners, they even traveled abroad.

But it seems that somewhere the bread was broken, and the friendship was broken. The leader one day called an emergency plenum and demanded Ben's punishment. He didn't bat an eye at this one. As the newspaper Bashkimi i Kombit reports, Ben responded to him in a flash: "Even if you condemned me, my party condemns me!"

***

In the first days, Tirana, Vlona and Gjinokastra were buzzing with theories that Ben would be killed inside. In the end, the party decided to throw him out. They exiled him to secondary and tertiary jobs, left him as a simple deputy without a point of weight, colleagues who until yesterday hung around his neck, did not even speak to him. They also put a patronageist behind him, who followed him everywhere he went: In the villa outside Tirana, in Dhërmi, in the apartments in the center of the capital, in Lalëz's house, in the London duplex, in Cyprus, Singapore, everywhere.

On the other hand, the rumors increased. It was said that Ben was kicked out not because the leader suddenly got out of his fun as a guy, - as happened to many others who for six months put them in the sky, and then suddenly dismissed them without any explanation - but because Ben had committed acts anti-party meeting and rubbing shoulders with the factionalist and cfurcologist with the IM stamp. Even in the infamous plenum, the leader himself asked, waving a chain in his hand: " On such and such a date, what did you want in the car that crashed on the way to Titist Macedonia?"

And at that moment the whole plenum was thrown into his throat. One accused him of speaking badly on the bus, another of having shown himself to be liberal, a third of having seen him angrily throw away the book of the leader "Kurbatka". The climax was when the distinguished plenum Spirulla Lizopali shouted: "Take the fleas, lice, bedbugs, ticks from our Skanderbeg...". It was Skenderbeu himself who motioned Spirulla to rest, alarmed that people would remember that he bathed once a year and really had all these insects.

***

So it happened that the Ben of the party became the Ben of the cans. He decided to be forgotten, so that they would forget him. Rumor has it that he is now happy with this useful recycling activity, which also puts some money in his pocket. For a change of environment, he occasionally goes to a football derby in Milan or Madrid, and on his way back he does some business in London, Glasgow or Manchester. Then the work resumes: He takes the Range Rover, parks it in a corner and starts collecting cans. He once said to someone:

"There's no such thing as a simple life, listen to Ben. Great politics, riches, shadows, tigers, are all illusions... Do you think these thieves will raise our assistance a bit this year, or are they cheating?"...

Note: Patronageist is a pro-recycling satirical column... of raw materials, not officials


Në përputhje me standarded JTI

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