
Quite disturbed by the news that a jackal decided to live in the urban jungle of Tirana, Monkey Kiko left his job ( as a tourist counter ) in Saranda and held his breath at the Zoo in the capital.
From the look on his face, it seemed that the jackal realized that this weekend he made the biggest mistake of his life by making international news.
However, Kiko was merciless with the questions that he answered himself, and as if the answer was not enough, he also gave him a piece of advice.
- What did you want to learn in Tirana, my love, Mr. Jackal?
- It is true that the night life in Tirana is wild, but not for wild animals with four legs.
Tip: if you want to live long avoid two-legged beasts. Haven't you heard that "man to man is a wolf"?
- Sir, why did you appear between the Opera and Ballet Theater and the National Museum?
My dear friend, the proper place for a savage in that country is the Parliament and Government building.
Tip: Your dramatic performance on TOB made quite an impression. According to the news, I found out that you were auditioning. Stay away from the stage. Stage is serious sport. Haven't you seen the bipeds how beautifully they act?
-" You were looking for free Wi-Fi, weren't you? -We believe the jungle has better connections. Have you seen how the 'birds and the bees' network? Perfection."
Tip: If you enter the human jungle, the lion will look like a domestic cat.
- I heard you were looking for morning coffee, right?
"Isn't the morning dew in the forest organic enough for your taste?"
Tip : Stick it in your head "Stick it in your head, in the city, you are not at the top of the food chain. You can easily end up on the plate of a restaurant that advertises "Biological wild meat, financed by EU IPARD funds.
-Have you started to be curious about the human world?
Don't! Don't be brave.
My advice: better stick to animal gossip. They are less jealous and depressing and more fun."
- Are you bored of life in the forest and wanted to start a new life as an influencer in social networks?
Change your mind before it's too late.
Tip: In the urban jungle, the less you show, the safer you are. From the social networks, the bipeds have started to open the hole to each other.
-Did you just want to experience what urban life is like in Tirana?
Seriously, have you seen how much rental prices have gone?
Tip: don't be impressed by the appearance, otherwise you will end up like the hedgehog who got behind a colored thistle that at the end of the day turned out to be a brush!
Why am I a fool who stays away from the Metropolis? !- said Kiko and suddenly shouldered the jackal against the cold wall of the Zoo.
Do you know why they put you in a cage? Do you know that you put yourself in danger by going somewhere where there are supervillains?
Advice: They have seen you as a poor competitor and in Albania they have never enjoyed fair competition. Didn't you know that even a tiger they had today is on the run? But wait, this story is not over.
There will be a tender for you jackal, as if they bought you in Africa or Asia and brought you to Albania by charter!
This will be the version that the government and all televisions that support the party will say, while the fact that you came to Tirana on all fours will be called fake news and conspiracy theories.
You will become famous, black jackal, because in a month the analysts will deal with you.
- Do you know what they will say?
They will say that you are related to the Iranians. Jackal etynologically derives from the Persian shagal, howler. This is where you become suspicious and a threat to cyber security.
Did you see how quickly they identified, located, arrested and isolated you? You underestimated the expression "only a spoon knows a vampire".
But there is hope: as we monkeys say, the jackal eats the jackal's flesh, but saves the bone.
Or as you jackals say: Jackal-jackal, but man wreaks havoc.