SOLUTION / Chaos ends, SPAK sets strict calendar for releasing hot videos

TIRANA - It was an ugly show for the new justice system last week, when the news about the existence of some hot videos that had come from the cell phones of criminals seized by SPAK, was not accompanied, as in the entire democratic world, with the release of the videos themselves.

Moreover, some other news added even more to the confusion created, as if the videos had not come from the Special Anti-corruption Prosecutor's Office, but from district prosecutors; as if they did not contain the most famous women of the show, but other women, less or not at all famous; as if the payments they had made for them were artificially inflated, for the effect of taxes and money laundering, etc.

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The issue became media and worried foreign partners as well. It seemed that the release of the news of the videos was not coordinated with the chronicle journalists, who instead of shedding light on the situation, one fell on Hoxha and the other on Lala. Seasoned anti-crime reporters tangled with each other. Someone said that the seized mobile phones had other videos than the names being rumoured. Another stated that he had seen the videos and they were not sure what.

Finally, SPAK chief Duman Tufani decided to gather the special structures, that is, the chronicle journalists, as well as some of the most trusted prosecutors with observer status.

He waited until the hall fell silent, and declared:

"We are the new justice, so this chaotic situation must end. I'm making it clear to you: I don't want to see a hot video released on social networks or worse, on porn sites, without me and my staff seeing it. Remember what used to be done with the old justice, when ballerinas and showgirls filled the Internet while the prosecution knew nothing? Well, forget it, I want order and discipline!"

Tufani also clarified to the deans of the journalistic chronicle that it is not good to inflate the figures of payments from Dubai for showgirls.

"Then, please, what is this 100,000 euros for one night or one week? Don't write fantasy at all when you don't know the market. Do not fall on the neck of people who have chosen the path of work!"

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Subsequently, the special meeting set a strict calendar for the regulation by law of video management and recycling. First, it was decided that with the shooting of the video, the news about its existence would be given, as if by accident, to a forensic expert. Then, two days later, a mega-news reporter would brief the public on the video's timing and technical details, such as light and contrast. Further, a super-journalist would inform that trusted sources in SPAK had inspected the video, and had decided that it should be shot again due to poor quality. "Even the prosecutors can give the status of repentant to any of the wanted, so that the filming is carried out within the legal framework, " the super-journalist would add.

According to the calculations of SPAK experts, the entire procedure would be completed within 20 days, until the release of the video on specialized sites, which could provide up to 200 thousand clicks per day.

After all the details were discussed, the head of SPAK declared: "Are we clear? Any comments? Then I declare the meeting closed!"        

Note: Patronageist is a pro-Tufan e Vullkan satirical column