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STUDY / A close connection between Free Health and the flourishing of funeral agencies is revealed

2024-06-29 15:35:58Patronazhisti SHKRUAR NGA REDAKSIA VOX
STUDY / A close connection between Free Health and the flourishing of funeral
Former Minister Manastirllesha studying the new facades of QSUT

TIRANA - A recent study by the "Veresije per Shëndë" association, financed by a 3 million euro project of the Asian Union, has revealed the existence of a close connection between the Free Health of the Albanian government, with the flourishing of funeral agencies in Tirana and districts of other countries.

The results of the study were made public to the media by the president of the association, Qylian Qylollari.

"After systematic surveys and surveys, we can safely say that the far-sighted project of the government has helped the local business tremendously. Specifically, I am talking about funeral agencies, which have gone from small and medium-sized businesses to big business," stated Qylollari.

The data says that since 2013, when the Rama government started the titanic effort to heal the Albanians without a penny, the funeral business is cutting the money with scissors.

"According to statistics, the Albanian government has so far spent 5 billion euros on free healthcare. With the same amount, the total turnover of funeral agencies has increased from the south to the north," said Qylollari.

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Detailing the data with the help of graphs, Qylollari highlighted some peak moments during these governing mandates, when the more free healthcare became, the more the turnover of funeral agencies increased.

"We see that when Prime Minister Rama appeared on a TV show with a rusty set of surgical tools, to show why free concessions were needed in free healthcare, the owners of the agencies in question gathered and had a big party, " said Qylian Qylollari.

Other moments when Albanian patients flew with joy and immediately loaded the mules to Shish-Tufina, were the inaugurations of new facades at QSUT, model flower gardens in regional hospitals, or quality restaurants for doctors next to operating rooms.

"A new facade at QSUT has increased by 25% the vacation expenses of the families of funeral owners. A smiling statement by the Minister of Health Manastirllesha, among several heads of pavilions and a rector, has filled all the funeral lunch reservations to full capacity," underlined Qylollari, showing the graphs.

At this rate, the expert declared, it is advisable to include funeral agencies in the calendar of tourist visits of foreign groups. 

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The owner of the "Three Men and a Leg" funeral agency, Xhenaz Qivuri, claimed for Patronajist after the publication of the study, that Prime Minister Rama would make a big mistake if he canceled Free Health and introduced it with a fee.

"In my opinion, Rama should continue as he started. He is doing a great job, but the Albanians are poor ladies, sir. They cannot pay for both health and burial. Health payments were starting, we went bankrupt! Or do you want us to go to Germany too?"

Note: Deep down, Patronageist is a satirical column


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