E-Albania/ New service, personalized notification is coming: Go brother, this country is not good!

TIRANA - The electronic services that the Albanian government offers to citizens through the e-Albania platform have been enriched more and more. The newest among the new innovations of this platform was recently announced by Deputy Prime Minister Bella Ballukja, who decided for a while to shift the focus away from the instructions she gives to engineers in front of the cameras, how to build bridges and with what thickness lay the asphalt.

Ballukja declared to the media that the latest product that comes to the aid of Albanian citizens is the personalized notification with the text: "It's no use getting tired, leave brother because this country is not good!"

"In this way, the citizen cuts time, makes the right decisions without the previous delays and gives direction to his life, " stated Ballukja.

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And really. In the previous obscurantist governments from 2013 to 2021, the average Albanian had to physically move from one state office to another. For a certificate, an attestation, medical examination, criminal record, permit and various documents to open a business, to keep a business open, to close a business, a list of grades, work book, and not master then, for mortgages, ownership certificates and other more serious papers, which the Patronageist does not care about.

Hospitals or confrontation with the police were separate tortures; fines, documentation for any car accident, payment of water and lights, etc., etc.

For all this, the lonely man had to travel by car, bus, bicycle or on foot, sweat, wait in line, return the next day, spend hours and days, nerves and fatigue, money and stress , and this is the only thing to declare at the end: I saw you... right in the state, this country is not boring!

In some cases, there were those immigrants who returned to work or invest in their homeland: well-educated Albanians who started working in the administration, and even directly as deputies. Or from those who came to spend their savings on opening a store, restaurant, etc. After a year or two, everyone was cursing themselves for having returned, praising the Prime Minister Tall, cursing all those under him who ate exotic fruits without the boss's knowledge, and said: "Old man, these are tiring Ed, finally this country is not boh!"

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This dark age is now over. No more wandering, sweat and toil. You can do all the actions through E-Albania. You can wait from the comfort of your home sofa as the certificate of ownership does not come out. You can put off the hours watching TV while you wait for the installment of the tax you paid to the state as a freelancer, not to be returned, despite the decisions of the Constitutional Court that that tax was illegal, and in the meantime electronically file another request.

In the end, you don't even need to insult the government, because it does that work for you, bringing the notification to your inbox in E-Albania: " Dear lady/sir, we inform you that this country is not , by the way!”  

Note: Patronageist is a satirical column without an inbox